ROVE MISSES DEADLINE FOR OCTOBER SURPRISE

Since Karl Rove spent more time than anticipated consulting with Diebold’s voting machine programmers for the November 7 election, he missed the deadline for the October Surprise the Republicans had promised their constituents. It is purported that Rove tried to pull an all-nighter October 30, on a last-minute plan to eradicate the states of Missouri, Tennessee, Virginia and New Jersey through Al Queda attacks, but no Al Queda operatives were available on such short notice. “What are we, Jiffy Lube?” an Al Queda spokesman sniped.”