CHALABI ADVISES BUSH TO SEND MORE TROOPS

Ahmed Chalabi, the former Iraqi advisor to the U.S. who is currently under investigation by the government for giving false information that led up to the war, has been seen holding secret meetings with the President, said an anonymous source. “At first the President seemed kind of skeptical when Chalabi suggested sending 20,000 extra troops into Iraq. But when he told Bush he had nice hair and he liked his tie, the President started warming up to the idea. And when Chalabi proclaimed that the blue suit he was wearing would really bring out his eyes in his 'Mission Accomplished' portrait, the President was sold."