MCCAIN TELLS HORNY CHRISTIANS TO DO THE HOKEY POKEY

As presidential hopeful John McCain courted Christian conservatives in the first primary state in the Bible Belt last weekend, he encouraged about 1500 South Carolina middle and high school students to say no to sex. "It’s imperative that you take responsibility and exhibit self-control before marriage," said the senator. "I have a long record of supporting abstinence-based initiatives. Here’s one that anyone can do:

You put your left hand in,
You put your left hand out;
You put your left hand in,
And you shake it all about.
You do the Hokey Pokey,
And you turn yourself around.
That's what it's all about!"